


Cooking with Fire (and literally nothing else)

by APenguinAteMySmarthphone



Category: Battle of Tokyo (LDH), The Rampage from Exile Tribe (Band)
Genre: Chaotic too, Crack, Don't Set the Kitchen On Fire, Fluff and Humor, Gift Fic, Humor, M/M, One Big Happy Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-22
Updated: 2020-08-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:28:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26033461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/APenguinAteMySmarthphone/pseuds/APenguinAteMySmarthphone
Summary: Kisaragi sets the kitchen on fire.Inspired by and based off of Furusato by @byullight, in that one chapter where apparently the kitchen was somehow set on fire.
Relationships: Kawamura Kazuma/Yoshino Hokuto, Lupus/Lucas
Kudos: 32





	Cooking with Fire (and literally nothing else)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [byullight](https://archiveofourown.org/users/byullight/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Furusato (ふるさと)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23312932) by [byullight](https://archiveofourown.org/users/byullight/pseuds/byullight). 



> Note: no actual kitchens except for the one in the RS universe were injured in the writing of this fic. No, I did not burn down a kitchen to test if it was actually possible to burn down a whole kitchen. Don't be silly...
> 
> The original fic is a masterpiece and quite frankly I am very much in love with it, so I have decided to write a small side story based off of it in my hopes to convey my gratitude to the author for writing such a wonderful and captivating story. And also, I am so very, very sorry if this wasn't what happened at all. 
> 
> (On a side note I made a BOT tag because I can and also I only added RS in here so I didn't really think there was too much to put in the fandoms tag part...)

Early mornings in the Rowdy Shogun base never followed a specific set patternーit all depended on the day, or whose turn for recon it was, or who was supposed to be making breakfast and who wanted to eat what and who wanted to eat at all. About the only members who ever followed a concrete morning schedule were Hades and Goemonーthey were both the leaders of the group, and they often, without a word to anyone else, took up many of the responsibilities in the morning that some of the younger members hadn't even noticed, when they had each first arrived. Now everyone did, and they tried to pitch in, but old habits die hard and the two still woke up the earliest, following their ingrained schedules to a T.

Turning over, Lucas tried very hard not to disturb the person sleeping next to himーit wasn't quite the time for everyone to be up, and it was a weekend anyhow. This didn't indicate there would be no work to concern themselves with, but it was an unspoken agreement between every member to give themselves a little leeway to take the day off, to the best that a group of fighters and protectors could take a day off, in a city that almost constantly needed to be watched and protected. 

The plants on the roof, he surmised, would not water themselves, and even if there wasn't a particular urgency to go tend to them, early mornings were sometimes the best (and possibly the only) times to go check up on them. What had started as a small hobby had become part of his daily routine, one of the few consistencies in a life that was full of things both strange and wonderful, the person at his side being of the latter. Carefully, he tried to slip out of bed without waking the otherーhe didn't think he would mind much if he did, but his own instincts told him to let the dark-haired man get as much peaceful rest as he possibly could.

Except when he put both his feet on the ground, he felt a strong hand, warm and reassuring, wrapped gently around his wrist, accompanied by a teasing voice, only slightly fuzzy with sleep.

"Where're you going so early?" Lupus stared up at him, eyes crinkling at the corners with his smile. 

"Good morning yourself," he laughed, not bothering with trying to dislodge his wrist from the other's gentle grip. "To check on them." He pointed upwards, and no words needed to be further said; Lupus knew plenty about Lucas' adoration for his garden, and they both referred to it with fondness, even if not everyone immediately caught up on the fact that "them" referred to a whole garden of plants, and the upwards point was an indication they were growing on the roof.

Lupus made an illegible noise of understanding, not bothering to pull himself up, even as he kept his grip firm on Lucas' wrist. Waiting patiently for his hand, which was being held hostage by his dark-haired lover, he glanced up at the dim and misty light of the early morning, shining faintly in their room. The base Rowdy Shogun occupied was in no ways similar to a default home anywhere in the city, but it was large and provided enough separate spaces to create rooms for each member. And while calling these openings standard windows may have confused some, to everyone here they served the same purpose, giving the members a view of the outdoors from the safety of shelter.

"Lupus," he said gently, shaking his wrist back and forth in floppy motions, "Come on, I want to go check on them. Or do you want to come with me?" The last part wasn't all that necessary, he knewーif Lupus wanted to come see the garden and tend it with him, he would do it, whether he was asked or not. If it was Lucas', then the raven-haired youth was bound to take care of it, treating it as carefully as his red-haired lover did. 

The only response he received was yet another unintelligible mumble, and, half-resigned, Lucas gently tried to pull his wrist free, prompting the other to only tighten his grip playfully. Lucas began to shake his entire arm, laughing when the other's grip didn't weaken in the slightest. When Lucas tried to stand again, Lupus pulled his entire arm back, making him lose his balance and stumble ungraciously backwards, landing on top of the other and eliciting a faint grunt.

"Luー" Turning his head around, intent on protesting a little more seriously, Lucas found himself staring into two pairs of deep brown eyes, so dark they were almost jet black, accompanied by a soft sensation on his lips, cutting off whatever he had been trying to say. They stayed locked in that position for what felt like an eternity, before he felt Lupus' hand gently wrap over his shoulder, pulling himself as close as he could, and Lucas had to lean backwards with the force of it. Feeling the curve of his lover's smile against his mouth, he felt a light shoving against his shoulder, and he knew what the other wanted, almost immediately, because that was how they'd always operated, always worked together, as smoothly and easily as if they had known each other for an eternity, every bit and piece that made them who they wereーit may very well be that way, owing to their combined loss of memories. As far as they were concerned, their worlds had started with each other, come what may. Relaxing his entire body, he let himself fall, gently and slowly, neither of them breaking off from the other the entire time.

It was at that moment that Travis rushed in, out of breath and face flushed from excitementーwhich tended to be his default state on a good dayーbarreling through the doorway with the force of battering ram. Lucas turned his head away quickly, as if burned, and Lupus gave an annoyed click of his tongue at the sudden interruption, earning him a smack on the arm, delivered with more force than the former had intended.

Travis' face went through a transition from harried urgency to startled embarrassment, his cheeks turning red again for a different reason. "Oh, whoops, am Iー" _Interrupting something,_ went the unfinished question, to which Lupus replied in a deadpan, "Yes. Yes, you just did." prompting Lucas to grab one of the cushions, shoving it against his face without breaking eye contact with his brown-haired friend. 

Ignoring his lover's muffled sounds of mock outrage, Lucas asked, as calmly as his beating pulse allowed, "What's wrong?" It was the best he could muster, and his friend was decidedly _not_ making it any less awkward, what with his sudden sputtering and turning his eyes away, abashed. 

Travis began to rock back and forth on the balls of his feet, mumbling, "I wanted to ask Lupus if he wanted to spar with me and Judy, andーdo you guys smell that?" He froze abruptly, still in the midst of his rocking, blinking in sudden confusion. 

_Smell what?_ Lucas almost asks, but he doesn't have toーhe smells it too. Lupus is on his feet now, the evil cushion pushed to the side, body tense as if testing the air, no doubt the smell having been caught by him as well. 

If he wasn't hallucinating, or if his nose was working properly, then he would have to say that was the smell of something decidedly _burning._

Lupus' face went hard with anger, and without another word to the other two, he raced out of the room with a whirl of his long coat, the tail smacking Travis on the leg as he ran out. Travis' face was white, and he mouthed _an attack?_ at Lucas, who could only shake his head. His abilities may have been facing some difficulty recently, but the red-haired power user was fairly confident that he would have noticed any signs of enemy activity so close to their base of operationsーeven more so if they had been doing something as shady and so obviously malignant as trying to burn the place down. 

(He tried not to dwell on the possibility that his powers had diminished so badly he _may_ have overlooked them.)

Glancing at each other, the two friends hurried out of Lucas' room; outside, throughout the base, he could see the other members of Rowdy Shogun, too, all looking either confused or battle-ready. He could see Hades and Goemon rush down from their watch posts, each with their respective weapons in hand. Bailey's head was spinning around in confused circles as he tried to locate the source of the burning smell, nearly crashing into Lupus, who sprinted past him with barely a mumble of an apology. A-Not, accompanied by a confused-looking Gusk and equally perturbed Miya, was half-equipped for a fight, but his movements were slower than usual, likely owing to his own bafflement. Marduk, with Marine and Joe at his back, seemed to have just come back from a patrol; he looked more ready for the threat than the others didーaside from maybe their two leadersーbut his expression looked to be slightly at ease; if anything, there was a hint of amusement about it, and it was that expression, coupled with Marine's one of almost comical panic, that told Lucas that this wasn't an enemy attack. Judy was leaning out of the workshopーthe room their "tech crew" occupied for nights at a time (in some instances, not all)ーshaking his head and calling out to Bailey, as if to calm him down. 

Travis gave Lucas a decidedly confused look, which he could only return. As if to pour oil into the concoction that was their already-swelling confusion, Sarutobi's cry suddenly shattered the tense silence of the base.

"Kisaragi, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

"No, don't turn the knob _that_ way, you're just making the fire woーTURN IT BACK!! TURN IT THE OTHER WAY!"

"Guys, I don't think the stove is supposed to _ENGULFED IN FLAME_!"

"SHIーOW! WATCH IT with the pan!"

"This thing is supposed to be a _PAN?!_ "

"Yesーand _put it down!_ I don't want you talking my nose out with that thing!"

"Where should Iー"

"Not _there,_ idiot, or else it's gonnaー"

"NOT THE TOWELS YOU FOOL!"

" _Why_ are they still lying there when they're _the most flammable objects in this entire freaking room??_ "

"Ow, don'tーdon't _push_ me you idiots!"

"KISARAGI!"

The other voice was that of Q-B'sーsurprisingly for the normally calm and collected youth, his tone was panicked, practically raised in a shout. Kisaragi's voice was there too, but it was more confused than anything, and the contents of their flying screams and shouts spoke enough of the situation being laid at their feet.

Lucas could feel a massive headache coming onーhe rubbed the space between his eyes, wondering how bad it would be if he retreated back to his room and pretended he had no clue what was going on. Travis' face was no longer white with panic; instead, he was rolling his eyes skyward, muttering, "If the kitchen gets destroyed _those three_ are paying for our meals until it gets fixed." 

Down below, there was a blast of orange flame, cheerfully spitting out sparks from the doorway leading to the kitchen, and the rest of Rowdy Shogun could do little but watch in bemused horror, with the panicked screeching of their unfortunate members echoing from inside.

* * *

"So," sighed Bailey, arms crossed in the 'disappointed-parent' pose so characteristic of him at times, which he assumed whenever one of the younger members (almost everyone) did something stupid. Which happened, unfortunately, fairly often. "What have we all learned today?"

"Never let Kisaragi in the kitchen again?" Q-B's face was understandably grumpy, gray soot still mixed in his raven-colored hair. He had immediately thrown the other two under the bus, even before Bailey's scolding started, stating that he had only been in the kitchen because he had heard the bickering duo and sensed imminent danger. 

"Shut up, Q-B." Kisaragi's arms were crossed, his face turned away in a huff. The edges of his sleeves were singed, and his lighter hair was even more noticeably dusty than Q-B's. There were streaks of ash on his face, which did little to mask his pout.

"Kisaragi."

"Sorry, Bailey-san."

In the end, it had been Lupus, along with the assistance of his trusted wolf partner Kogarashi, who had pulled the trio out of the kitchen, each still yelling indignantly at the other. Sarutobi and Kisaragi in particular had been practically shouting each other down (well, it was mostly Sarutobi doing the shouting, while Kisaragi grumpily turned his head away) and Q-B had looked, for all the world, like he wanted to vanish on the spot. Lupus had given him a sympathetic pat on the head, and behind him Bailey and Marine had charged into the burning kitchen with a fire extinguisher, a contraption that, up until now, Lucas had seen as more of a placeholder item in any home in mostly any galaxy. Seeing one put to proper use provided for a bit of extra entertainment, but it didn't change the loss of their kitchen, and the added financial cost this now served.

Staring into the still blackened kitchen, Miya asked in a tone close to awe, "How did you guys even manage to do _this much damage_ in one morning? I could've sworn you weren't in the kitchen for that long."

"Yeah, not even Miya-san could do that much damage when burning his gyoza."

" _Marine, I swearー_ "

"Guys," Goemon sighed, "Save _that_ particular argument for another time, please."

Bailey merely sighed another long, disappointed sigh. Lucas could visibly see the droop in their backsーBailey seldom yelled or got terribly upset, but putting him in this sort of mood made anyone feel no end of guilt. In the background, Marduk rolled his eyes, amusement making his lip curve upward, while Gusk and Judy shot each other wry glances with just their eyes. Lupus was silent, too intent on brushing all the soot out of Kogarashi's fur to care too much about the fates of his cohorts, whose chances were looking more grim by the second as Hades shook his head silently, exasperation written across his face as clear as day. Miya was still staring with some measure of awe at the husk of their kitchen, Travis and A-Not joining him to get a better look for themselves. Every member of Rowdy Shogun was here, and, Lucas realized belatedly, none of them had had breakfast. Or _would,_ he thought wryly, considering their current state of affairs. No one would be able to cook up anything anytime soon. 

Sarutobi was nursing his bruised arm, which he'd gotten when Kisaragi had knocked him into the counter several times while they had been scrambling with the chaos that was their exploding kitchen. His own clothes were singed and covered in burns, the fabric browning here and there, holes eating their way into the sleeves. His face was completely sulkyーeither from anger at his friend, or from the fact that he, too, was a recipient of Bailey's scoldings. There was little he could do, Lucas thought with amusement, to protest; Bailey was a force to be reckoned with once his 'overprotective parental switch' got going. 

"The next time we go on patrol together," Sarutobi hissed in Kisaragi's earーLucas could hear them, as plain as day, as if they had said the words in their minds and broadcast them to him. "I am _so_ leaving you to fend for yourself if things get hairy." 

"Not if I ditch you first." Kisaragi spit out his tongue, subtly, expression not changing an inch.

"Traitor."

"You said it first."

" _Both of you,_ " Bailey shot the bickering duo his sternest glare. "Cut it out."

""Sorry.""

Lucas didn't realize that Lupus had walked up to him until he could feel the other's presence right at his shoulder. Kogarashi was nowhere to be seen, likely summoned back to whatever realm he occupied when he wasn't answering to Lupus' call. Biting back a yawn, he glanced at the unfortunate trio, who was being subject to endless scoldings courtesy of Bailey, before shooting the redhead a small grin, wry as it was. Well, Lucas thought, in this case, they sort of (no, _definitely_ ) deserved it.

Goemon sighed. "This is probably going to take a while," he said, pointing at Bailey, and then the other three in turn. "So you all go do whatever you want, sleep some more or start your day, however you please, while we decide what to do with the issue of breakfast."

Travis grinned. "I know a good restaurant," he called, perking up, "Kinda shady, but then again, what restaurant in Cho-Tokyo isn't?"

Soon voices of debate surrounding what places offered this or that, which had catering, and which was the most recommended by the city's denizens began to rise, scattering voices cheerfully arguing one anotherーas loud as they got, however, all of them made sure not to raise their voices above Bailey's, and Lucas had to bite his tongue not to laugh when Kisaragi, who was always at his side as backup and protection, shot him a pleading glance, a note of desperation in his face. Lupus noticed too, and, very deliberately, he wrapped one arm around Lucas' shoulders, carefully dragging the latter away from the chaotic circle, while Lucas mouthed "sorry" to the younger man, who watched him with an expression of betrayal.

"It's too early for this," the black-haired young man yawned, his coat still covered here and there with small flakes of soot. "Leave them at it; at the rate they're going, it will take all morning before they decide where to eat, and by then it'll be lunch." 

Lucas laughed, which prompted the other to grin at him with some hint of satisfaction at the success of his joke. Letting himself be dragged away from the still-arguing group, he saw Marduk throw them both a very casual salute before smacking Marine upside the head, lightly, as the other persistently tried to insist why so-and-so restaurant was particularly good, desperate to get the other on his side. Q-B, noticing their departure, mouthed "save me" towards them, to which Lucas couldn't help but laugh again, until Lupus made him turn around, the two of them headed back towards their room, and, hopefully, to get to Lucas' plants, at some point or another. Judging from the languid expression on Lupus' face, that as well would likely take awhile. 

"Come on," his lover said, voice low as he buried his face into Lucas' hair to gently kiss him atop the head. "Let's pick up where we left off."

**Author's Note:**

> *caws maniacally* AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA what am I doing.
> 
> So anyway, it's short, but I hope the author likes it. Their universe was too tempting to resist, and I felt *sparkles* inspired. To the nth degree of inspiration. 
> 
> And you can interpret that last part however you want to, in whatever context you would like. I'm just gonna imagine that they went back and very lovingly had their own argument about what to eat for breakfast now that the kitchen is gone.


End file.
